Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
