bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Randomize
