wake up i wanna do it froggy style
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
