I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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