That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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