cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
