check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
