You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
We don't watch enough power rangers
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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