brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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