Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize