standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
