I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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