just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize