can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
