So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
and you fell through a lawn chair
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
