I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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