Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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