This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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