Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Go christen that room with your naked body.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize