I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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