I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
