She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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