Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
