umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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