He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
