are you so shy because you have an std?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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