it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
