Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
