Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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