Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
