Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
so much tequila, so little girl.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
