It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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