Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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