Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
