Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
