he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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