My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
