dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
