South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
