Nicole vs. Life
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
well most of my day revolves around power hour
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
