All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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