I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
