Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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