why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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