I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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