Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
