Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
