Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Randomize
