Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
