420 ftw
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
