Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
