Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize
